Of Reasons and Dog Poo

OK. Getting a little silly with the title... but I can only take myself so seriously for so long. Still, this is a continuation of the last two posts.

We All Have Our Reasons
My Reason

Part of the shame and humiliation of 12-year-old memories is the way they force my to view myself and the way my identity is constructed. I felt weak and powerless and ugly and worthless.

My Reason

This post is a continuation of We All Have Our Reasons.

Have I mentioned my reason for all the dental stuff? I feel like I probably have. I feel like I get stuck in these loops where I say too much about it and make people uncomfortable and they wonder why I don't just shut up and get over it... why I let an event that lasted something like 2 or 3 hours (if you don't count the years leading up to it) keep interfering with my life, now approximately 12 years later.

We All Have Our Reasons

I spent a good portion of my day at the endodontist. The first hour or so was awful. I was so nervous that I forgot to bring the X-rays and referral information from my regular dentist. They were very kind and assured me it was fine. I was trying not to act nervous, mind you. But I was shaky. Distracted.

I hate anything dentistry related. And no, it's not because I'm just a big hysterical wimp. At least, I don't see it that way. It's not so bad with my regular dentist. It's the new ones that freak me out.

What they don't get and I don't know how to explain is that I am not worried about the pain.